When you were a kid, you thought dating would be simple: you meet an awesome person, you know you both like each other, and you’re automatically together, right? But that’s not what happens in real life. You find more than few uncomfortable moments and it’s same for everyone even though you might be a pro at relationship. The just-started-dating period is freaking awkward and they might make you feel shy in all your firsts in the relationship. No matter how into the guy you are, you’re bound to experience a number of these awkward moments. Some of these are issues which arise when you’re becoming more intimate… like your first time together. Seriously, everything about your first time with someone is awkward.
Here are few things to keep in mind as to why things can get so awkward in the first part of a relationship.
1. You have just started learning things about each other
A simple reason for this awkwardness may be justified that you are still new to each other and haven’t known each other that much. When you’re dating someone new, there’s always that strange moment when you realize that you didn’t know something that’s, well, important. It may be his birthday. It could be that he has an allergy to peanuts, which you’ll find out when he tells you he can’t eat the peanut butter pie you ordered for dessert. Whatever the case, it will be a huge reminder that no matter how intimate you are, you still don’t know everything about each other.
2. You are trying to understand and read your partner
Sometimes while you still are understanding your partner you try to read into your partner as to what kind of person he is. Stop trying to read into each and every thing your partner does because it is just awkward for you and him when you try to dig information out of each and everything he says. Stop trying to multitask between being yourself and reading your partner because things are going to happen and you’ll get to know him eventually.
Read Also: The Biggest Relationship Challenges You’ll Have To Deal With, According To Your Zodiac Sign
3. You haven’t established trust yet
Relationships are awkward in the beginning because trust has yet to be established. When we trust another, we reduce fear, when we reduce fear, we alleviate the anxiety of being rejected.” In the meantime, you (and, likely, your partner) are wondering if you can really trust this new person. To help move the awkwardness, have the courage to be yourself, have the courage to be honest, and have the courage to trust your intuition about the person you are deciding to spend your time with. Though you may be unsure about whether you can really trust them yet, if you give them the benefit of the doubt and go in with an open heart, you have a better chance at happiness.
4. You’re trying too hard
Relationships are so awkward in the beginning because both partners are putting forth so much energy trying to impress one another. When two people first meet, they aren’t usually comfortable with being their total selves, so they put on facades and sometimes curb certain behaviors — and in some cases, suppress true feelings and opinions. You both are just trying to make a good impression on each other. There are several firsts on the way where you try to smooth play it, curb their own feelings, behaviors etc that they think might give a wrong impression. But the thing is if you are in a relationship with a person for a longer time you are going to know the true colors of each other and when they do pop up you actually feel awkward. You just do not know what to do at that point of time.
5. You’re avoiding conversation about your Ex
You can avoid it all you want but it will surely come up. You know what we’re talking about: the dreaded ex conversation. Envisioning a guy you’re into being with anyone else in the world is painful. It can make you insane, but it is a necessary conversation. In order to be in a relationship with someone, you kind of have to know his past. He may be just getting out of a long-term relationship and not want anything serious. Maybe, he’s never actually been in a relationship and doesn’t know what to do. Whatever the case, you’ll need to know his history and he’ll need to know yours. You may not want to fess up to your whole relationship history. It can be awkward if you’ve cheated on someone or hooked up with one of his friends in the past. Talking about the past is totally awkward but it’s sometimes necessary in order to have a future together.
6. When you have to meet their family
What’s more awkward than meeting the people who gave birth to the guy you’re sleeping with? To them, he is their little, baby boy. To you, he’s, well… something else entirely. As a new relationship drifts into a more serious phase, this is something you will have to experience and it’s a pretty awkward experience. They are watching and judging everything you do. Even if they are sweet and welcoming, they are still judging you. Like we said, he is their baby boy.
7. Emotional intimacy is still not there
Emotional intimacy is as important as physical intimacy. In some relationships, physical intimacy takes place way before emotional intimacy is established and things get a bit awkward. When we think of intimacy, we often think of sex. But emotional intimacy is just as important to a relationship. If you and your partner are emotionally distant, you won’t get much out of your interactions, and you may even start to resent each other. The fact is when you have sex and when you still do not have established that level of emotional intimacy you just do not know how to act after it. You feel awkward the morning after. You are just clueless.
8. You’re seeing him naked for the first time
Hopefully this is super hot and thrilling and not actually awkward at all, but things happen. The first time we get physical with someone, there’s a lot to take in, from penis size to manscaping and everything in between. Plus, we don’t know each other’s personal preferences, so there can be a bit of trial and error involved the first time we get down. If you happen to be caught totally off guard by something weird happening, it’s best to speak up now or forever hold your peace.
9. The morning after you’re drunk together for the first time
Should you bring up the fact that he said he wants you to come on his family vacation with him? Did you dream that he said “I love you,” or did that actually happen? This would all be so much easier to figure out if your head didn’t hurt so bad.
10. The first time you do it
The thing about the first time with someone is that it’s usually really awkward. Sure, it will be special because you’re really into said person, but there’s also the maneuvering of each other’s bodies. You don’t know what he likes yet. He doesn’t know what you like yet. With the confusion, there is also the added pressure of the first time. You want to be so good, like the best sex ever. Between the confusion, pressure and insecurity, it’s usually a much more awkward time than a hot time. We’re not saying your sex with him will never be hot. In fact, it’s bound to get hotter and hotter each time because you’ll no longer feel like strangers in the bedroom.