Self-confidence is an essential part of humanity. A person with self-confidence generally likes themselves, is willing to take risks to achieve their personal and professional goals, and thinks positively about the future. Someone who lacks self-confidence, however, is less likely to feel that they can achieve their goals, and tends to have a negative perspective about themselves and what they hope to gain in life. The good news is that self-confidence is something you can improve! Building self-confidence requires you to cultivate a positive attitude about yourself and your social interactions, while also learning to deal with any negative emotions that arise and practicing greater self-care.
1. Turn your negative thoughts to positive thoughts.
Your negative thoughts might sound like this: “I can’t do that,” “I will surely fail”, “no one wants to hear what I have to say.” This inner voice is pessimistic and unhelpful and will hold you back from achieving high self-esteem and greater self-confidence. As you pay attention to your negative thoughts, turn them around to positive thoughts. This may take the form of positive affirmations, such as “I am going to try it,” “I can be successful if I work at it,” or “people will listen to me.” Start with just a few positive thoughts a day.
2. Dress nicely.
A corollary of the first item above … if you dress nicely, you’ll feel good about yourself. You’ll feel successful and presentable and ready to tackle the world. Now, dressing nicely means something different for everyone … it doesn’t necessarily mean wearing an expensive outfit, but could mean casual clothes that are nice looking and presentable.
3. Maintain a positive outlook.
More than just thinking positive, you have to put it into action. Action, actually, is the key to developing self-confidence. It’s one thing to learn to think positive, but when you start acting on it, you change yourself, one action at a time. You are what you do, and so if you change what you do, you change what you are. Act in a positive way, take action instead of telling yourself you can’t, be positive. Talk to people in a positive way, put energy into your actions. You’ll soon start to notice a difference.
4. Believe in your own worth.
Recognize that means making yourself a priority some of the time. Think of something you want to do and do it. Give yourself permission to say no, ask for what you want, or maneuver into a position to make it happen. Be prepared to tolerate disappointing others for the sake of recognizing that you matter and taking care of yourself.
5. Handle mistakes and failures in a more positive way.
If you go outside of your comfort zone, if you try to accomplish anything that is truly meaningful then you will stumble and fall along the way. And that is OK. It is normal. It is what people that did something that truly mattered have done throughout all ages. Even if we don’t always hear about it as much as we hear about their successes.
6. Look at what you’ve already achieved.
It’s easy to lose confidence if you believe you haven’t achieved anything. Make a list of all the things you’re proud of in your life, whether it’s getting a good mark on an exam or learning to surf. Keep the list close by and add to it whenever you do something you’re proud of. When you’re low in confidence, pull out the list and use it to remind yourself of all the awesome stuff you’ve done.
7. Do one thing that scares you every day.
If you are insecure, guess what? The rest of the world is too. Do not overestimate the competition and underestimate yourself. You are better than you think. The best way to overcome fear is to face it head-on. By doing something that scares you every day and gaining confidence from every experience, you will see your self-confidence soar. So, get out of your comfort zone and face your fears!
8. Be kind and generous.
Helping someone else often enables us to forget about ourselves and to feel grateful for what we have. It also feels good when you are able to make a difference for someone else. Instead of focusing on your own weaknesses, volunteer to mentor, practically assist or teach another, and you’ll see your self-confidence grow automatically in the process.
9. Set a small goal and achieve it.
People often make the mistake of shooting for the moon, and then when they fail, they get discouraged. Instead, shoot for something much more achievable. Set a goal you know you can achieve, and then achieve it. You’ll feel good about that. Now set another small goal and achieve that. The more you achieve small goals, the better you’ll be at it, and the better you’ll feel. Soon you’ll be setting bigger (but still achievable) goals and achieving those too.
10. Identify your talents.
Everyone is good at something, so discover the things at which you excel, and then focus on your talents. Give yourself permission to take pride in them. Express yourself, whether it’s through art, music, writing, or dance. Find something you enjoy and cultivate a talent to go with your interest.
11. Stop comparing yourself to others.
If you want to build your self-confidence, then you have to focus on improving your own life for the better, not on making your life more like your best friend’s, your older brother’s, or like those of the celebrities you see on television. If you want to build up your confidence, then you need to know that there will always be someone who is prettier, smarter, and richer than you, just like there will always be someone who is less attractive, less intelligent, and less wealthy than you are; all of this is irrelevant, and what is relevant is caring about advancing your own goals and dreams. You may lack confidence because you’re convinced that everyone else has it better than you do.
12. Avoid perfectionism.
Perfectionism paralyzes you and keeps you from accomplishing your goals. If you feel like everything has to be done perfectly, then you’ll never be truly happy with yourself or your circumstances. Instead, work on learning to be proud of a job well done instead of wanting everything to be absolutely perfect. If you’re in the mindset of a perfectionist, then you’ll only be getting in the way of a more confident version of yourself.
13. For tough times, when all else fails: Create a great list
Life is full of challenges and there are times when it’s difficult to keep our self-confidence up. Sit down right now and make a list of all the things in your life that you are thankful for, and another list of all the things you are proud of accomplishing. Once your lists are complete, post them on your refrigerator door, on the wall by your desk, on your bathroom mirror–somewhere where you can easily be reminded of what an amazing life you have and what an amazing person you really are. If you feel your self-confidence dwindling, take a look at those lists and let yourself feel and be inspired all over again by you.
Like what you read. Now share this article with all your friends and relatives so that they can also get some benefit. Also join us on our Facebook Page.