We love to compare men and women. We like to see who is, stronger, smarter, more creative, better at languages, etc. Studying the sexes never gets old. And we will continue to evaluate our differences until we get bored or until we’re blue in the face. We like to learn about each other because in doing so we can learn more about ourselves. The 90s relationship book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus didn’t lie –even the symbols that represent us show that we come from different planets. However, just because two things vary doesn’t mean commonalities won’t exist. Clearly, we have some things in common with men, more than we’d like to admit. By studying men we learn about women, but we can also just, well, learn about men.
1. Men do like cuddling
Although the chances are that your man probably won’t like cuddling quite as much as you do, many men still do like cuddling. It can be hard for men to admit this because cuddling is often seen as “girly” or “feminine,” but many men still like to cuddle. Cuddling is a chance to connect on a physical level that isn’t purely sexual. It’s a chance to touch you without the intent of actually having sex. This can be satisfying for the man as well as the woman. Sometimes men just want to connect in this way as well.
2. Men crave appreciation
Most women don’t fully understand how crucial it is for a man to feel appreciated, and the enormous impact expressions of appreciation can have on him. Granted, everyone likes to be acknowledged and appreciated, but women don’t need it in the same way and to the same extent that men do. Just as most women primarily need to feel cherished and adored, men need to feel appreciated and admired to be truly satisfied in a relationship.
3. Men like so many things about women that women don’t even realize
This is a secret about men that many women don’t really understand. Everything from the way you wear your hair, to your handwriting, to your reaction to movies, to the flowers you put on the kitchen table, there is a good chance that your man appreciates you in many different ways that you could not have possibly anticipated.
4. Men are afraid of losing their freedom
This is true. The misconception that gets perpetuated, though, is that men hate commitment, are anti-relationship, and just want to run wild and do whatever they want. This isn’t actually the case. Freedom for a man is more of a psychological state than having the actual freedom to run around and do whatever he wants. No one talks about this, though. Instead, books and articles are written giving women a playbook to trap a man into commitment. They paint a picture that looks a lot like the coyote chasing after the roadrunner.
5. Men often dread the “time of the month” just as much as you do
Even though men don’t have to endure the cramping, headaches and general malaise that accompany premenstrual syndrome for women, that doesn’t mean he has nothing to fear. The reason is because he often has to undergo a set of symptoms himself. Some of these symptoms include everything he does is wrong, he is forced to undergo excessive arguments which he can never win, he has to buy lots of chocolate, he is blamed for random problems, or he becomes the emotional punching bag of an extremely hormonal woman.
6. Actions speak louder than words
Men cannot read minds and they are not as expressive as most women are. Tell your man what you want and he will try to give you that. Stop expecting him to understand and fulfill your expectations on his own. Tell him what you expect and want. For example if you want him to surprise you with a special date tell him you love it when he surprises you with a date. Men have a decreased ability to be intuitive about what a woman wants so you’ll have to make sure he really knows your likes and dislikes.
7. Men need space too
Sometimes women become overly solicitous and get too involved so that men feel suffocated. If your guy is asking for some space, don’t take it personally, he actually just needs space. It doesn’t have anything to do with you or your relationship. Taking time for yourself to do your own thing is healthy and you should enjoy some alone time too. Relationships that feel too suffocating for a man may make him run the other way.
8. If he is upset, he may be hiding deep emotional wounds
Men oftentimes express themselves differently than women do. It is often harder for guys to be vulnerable because they are trained to be strong and tough. So if you suspect that something is really bothering your man, but he isn’t talking about it, there’s a good chance that you are right. He may just seem sullen or different somehow.
9. A lot of the things men do are to impress you
You may not realize it, but if your boyfriend is acting tough in a bar, or getting you expensive gifts, or doing other things to put on a show, he is probably trying to impress you. You may just think that this is how he behaves naturally, but the chances are that he wouldn’t go through so much effort if he wasn’t trying to at least get your approval. You can see this in action when you mention something you like, and your guy suddenly tries to show you what he knows about that particular topic.