Those who once experienced the pain and agony of surviving and getting out of a toxic relationship with an abusive partner know exactly how addictive this bond can be. The worst part is that you usually don’t perceive it as a toxic relationship until one day the cold, harsh reality strikes you and makes you wonder where were you all this time. But, that is the way it was designed in the first place. You don’t feel it all at once, because they make sure to build everything up over time and destroy you in the long run.
Here are 9 things you’re likely to experience once you meet a kind, an honest man after a toxic relationship:
1. You will learn to appreciate yourself
Getting out of that toxic relationship and meeting a kind, honest person will positively influence you and help you learn the importance of self-love. You’ll finally see the good in you. You’ll finally realize that the only person who controls your life is you.
2. You already know what love is
Despite the way things ended, you experienced a real love, which is so much more than most people can say for themselves. So don’t get too hung up on things if you can’t find someone for a while afterwards. It’s rare to find the real thing in a sea full of somethings. Especially after you just got out of something so intense.
3. You become more empathetic
When you’ve experienced such trauma, it’s only normal and human, to relate to those who are either currently experiencing similar abuse or have experienced such abuse in the past. Once people have been abused, they become very aware of — and compassionate to — other people inflight.
4. You don’t trust easily
After a toxic relationship, you don’t trust anyone. Even yourself. You wonder how you tolerated such a relationship for so long. And you enter every relationship expecting the worst of someone. For a while, you don’t believe good guys do exist. Because for so long you looked for the wrong qualities and you accepted a lot of these people who didn’t deserve you.
5. You started over analyzing everything
You have a problem accepting the fact that someone can truly be with you because they genuinely love you, not for the sake of using you. So, you start over analyzing everything. You don’t believe people can be honest or mean what they say. You make crazy assumptions and doubt really good people just because of one person.
6. You’ll think he’s too good to be true
Someone treating you this well has got to be too good to be true. You’re expecting the other shoe to drop. You’re expecting him to lose it one day. You’re expecting some abrupt ending without closure. But every day he just proves to you he’s the same person he’s been from the start. He’s given you no reason to question him but it isn’t him you don’t trust it’s everyone in the past.
7. You’re going to expect fights
You keep waiting for a fight. But instead, everything gets talked out and explained. And there’s this wave of comfort afterward and you realize normal people don’t leave the second something goes wrong.
8. Then you’ll apologize too often
He’s going to wonder why you apologize so often or what it is you’re saying sorry for. He’ll see the pain in your eyes from someone in the past whose made you question yourself. He’ll see the pain in your heart trying so hard to love again when you’ve only known heartbreak. And he’s going to constantly reassure you everything is okay.
9. And you trust him
There’s going to be a moment where you tell this guy everything that’s happened. A moment you trust him to let him that close. And when you tell him about the past and the people who have hurt you what you’ll find isn’t that’s he’s going to take off. It’s just given him a reason to stay.
And you’ll finally feel what it means to love someone who loves you and cherishes you from the bottom of their heart.