There is nothing quite as electrifying or soul-satisfying as falling in love—thinking maybe, just maybe, you’ve found a partner to spend your life with. Some relationships are strong enough to last a lifetime, and it’s not attributed to luck or chance. It’s thanks to continuous efforts from both partners and a desire to be together. There are certain qualities that should never be missing from a loving partnership, and once they are, it’s only a matter of time until things start to fall apart. There is no single secret to making a relationship last because it involves so many other aspects that depend on one another. The key is whether you’re able to maintain each of those parts.
Sometimes we lose sight of what is really important because we think loving someone is the sole reason to be in a relationship, but it’s not. Here are the values I think are more important than love for a relationship to work.
This may seem obvious, but so many people are with partners they don’t trust. Work on building your confidence and loving yourself completely prior to setting foot in another relationship. The stronger you are as an individual, the easier it will become to trust. And if your partner really isn’t trustworthy, ask yourself why you’re staying. Your relationship will not survive without trust. No matter how good things are, one person’s doubt is enough to drive the rest into the ground.
2. Mutual Respect
This one should go without saying, but every healthy relationship should be built upon mutual respect. One of the most important things a couple can have is respect for one another’s differences, preferences, and opinions. Without it, a relationship will never last because either one or both of you can inevitably do better.
Being truthful and honest is major when it comes to relationships. A relationship built on false hope and white lies will only crumble in the end, no matter how much you love the other person. Being honest leads to good communication, which can strengthen many aspects of a relationship.
The honeymoon phase of not being able to keep your hands off each other will naturally fade over time. But that shouldn’t mean that affection should be completely forgotten. Verbal and physical reminders, such as saying “I love you” and touching when speaking, reinforce your connection.
Communication is key in any relationship to define boundaries. You need it to express feelings, needs and expectations. You need it to solve conflicts and you even need it when it comes to intimacy. Without good communication, how can anything in the relationship be clear and the rest of these values be strengthened?
There’s always going to be things you both do that piss each other off. People make mistakes. But as long as you can let the little things go, and be willing to leave old grudges behind, you’ll have a good chance of going the distance together. One the golden rules of a relationship— pick your battles.
Your significant other is your partner in life and, therefore, your greatest support system. You’ll be much more successful by working with and not against them. You both need to come together as a team. If you’re not a team and you don’t have equality, it can make you unhappy enough to spoil the relationship, whether there’s great love or not.
Relationships are all about give and take. If one partner only takes and never gives, something is bound to break. Healthy relationships need compromise in order to work and to establish happiness between both partners.
Are you safe in your relationship? If the answer is “no,” then it doesn’t matter even a little bit how much you love the person. The love may make it harder to leave, and harder to stay away, and that’s a real struggle. But love itself won’t make a partner who is abusing you stop. If you don’t feel safe with your significant other then you are not in the right relationship.
Intimacy is not only limited to sex, although sex does play a crucial role in relationship success. It comes in layers, becoming more authentic and sweeter with time and care. Intimacy requires a deeper understanding of each other that’s far more significant than physical attraction.
You should always be each other’s biggest cheerleader. Encourage your partner to go after what they want and ensure them that you’ll be by their side no matter the result. By being excited about each other’s achievements and celebrating even the little things, both parties benefit from a supportive relationship.