When you’ve been with someone long enough, when you’ve invested an unlimited amount of time, love and affection towards making a relationship work, and when you’ve built up all your life’s hopes and dreams keeping just this one person in mind, you get accustomed to letting things go. You learn to compromise. You learn to forgive. And you learn to believe that nothing can be bigger than this relationship.
We all make mistakes in a relationship, but there are some things that guys do that should never be forgiven. By letting him get away with things that are disrespectful to you and your relationship, you’ll only be headed toward a lifetime of betrayal, disrespect, and sadness. Here’s are list of some of the most awful things your man can do to damage your relationship, and the reasons why you should NEVER forgive him.
1. You’ve caught him lying to you on several occasions.
Yes, all of us tend to tell a few white lies time and again. But if you’ve noticed how your guy keeps lying to you about the smallest of things, and about things that don’t really matter just for the heck of it, then you might just be in a relationship with a pathological liar. And if he can’t even speak the truth on the little things, how will you ever trust him with things that actually matter? There might even come a time when you’re unable to distinguish his lies from the actual truth. And my advice would be to leave before you allow that to happen.
2. He keeps ditching plans.
If he doesn’t agree to go to a party where he doesn’t even know anyone because he’s too tired from work or he isn’t really in the mood for meeting new people, then just cut him some slack. That part is completely understandable. But if he sets up plans with you and ends up ditching them last-minute on a regular basis, then it’s clear that he doesn’t really respect your time or have much interest in meeting you. A guy who truly loves you will keep looking for reasons to see you, rather than ditching the plans that you
3. He keeps invading your privacy.
Have you ever caught him going through your phone the minute you leave for the bathroom? Did he end up checking your entire Facebook inbox the day you accidentally left your account open on his laptop? Is he always convincing you to give him all your passwords? If the answer to any of these questions is a yes, then it’s clear that your partner will not leave any chance to snoop around and invade your privacy. Even when you don’t have anything to hide, such behavior is just plain annoying and reflects how your partner has some serious trust issues. And a relationship is bound to end if it isn’t based on the foundation of trust.
4. He keep texting his Ex.
Exes are a tricky subject when it comes to new relationships. Unless your guy has been living under a rock his whole life, he’ll probably have an ex or two lingering around. If he’s strictly platonic with these past lovers, there’s nothing to worry about. But if you discover he’s sending flirty messages to his ex-girlfriend, then honey, don’t forgive him. It’s time for you to get a new boyfriend.
5. He blames you for everything.
Being with a partner who is always criticizing and blaming you for your actions can act as a huge blow to your self-esteem. When the one person whose opinion you value the most can never stop from seeing the negative in you at all times, there comes a point when you actually start to blame yourself as well. You actually start to believe in all the bad things you hear. And you actually start to think that there is something extremely wrong with you. It’s probable that this negativity is only a sign of his own insecurities. It stems from his need to make himself feel better. Stop listening to the things he says and move on to find better, more positive people in life.
6. He physically abuses you.
A guy who lays his hands on you is a guy who doesn’t respect you at all! He has bigger issues that you will never be able to help him with. When things get physical, your life is in danger. Don’t try to question why he acts out physically, just get as far away from him and as far away from the situation as possible.
7. He cheats on you.
For me, the ultimate betrayal in a relationship is when your partner has the audacity to cheat on you. I can forgive a person if they fall out of love with me and decide to break up. But I can never forgive them if they make the conscious choice to go behind my back, hook up with someone else, and hurt me in such a deep way. Because cheating isn’t just about love, what it truly reflects is the amount of respect you have for the person you’re with. Forgiving a guy who cheats on you just means that you’re agreeing to be disrespected.
8. He disrespects you.
Whether it’s by cursing you, by trivializing your problems in life, by belittling the efforts you make, or just with his general attitude towards you, you don’t have the time to put up with a person like that. Nobody in this world has the right to disrespect you in any way and while this might seem like a small issue as compared to the huge problems couples face, this can actually become the root cause of deeper issues ahead. Stop waiting for this attitude to turn into a bigger problem and leave him while you still can.
9. He disrespects you family and friends.
A guy who truly loves you will be more than eager to know the people in your life better. He will look for ways to connect with the people who are important in your life just so he can feel even closer to you. It doesn’t matter how annoying your family might be. It doesn’t matter how different he is from your friends. If your guy isn’t even making an effort to know them better and doesn’t leave a single chance to make a joke about them, then it’s clear that he doesn’t really care enough about this relationship.
10. He keeps bringing up the past.
Every couple has fights. Every couple goes through rough times. And every couple has said horrible things to each other that they’ve regretted instantly. But if you truly want to move forward from things like these in a healthy and happy way, it’s important to leave the past behind. Old arguments and problems should be completely erased from your mind once you decide to kiss and make up. But if you’ve noticed how your boyfriend has made a mental list of every bad thing that has ever happened in this relationship and if he has the habit of bringing up past incidents in every fight you have, it’s possible that your relationship will always stay stuck in that bad phase.
11. He never makes you a priority.
A guy will make you a priority in his life if he really loves you and wants to be with you. So if you start to notice that he’s no longer spending time with you on weekends, and his friends get first dibs on his days off, he’s clearly not that into the relationship. Don’t bother nagging and begging for his attention, it will only make things worse. Do yourself a favor and dump him. Now he can have all the time in the world to chill with his bros.